Reasons Why Black Women Are Single?
In a world full of hot blooded males fighting for power, we as women fight for our men’s attention.
Now I don’t know about some of you, but as a black woman there was once a time it felt like I was never going to find my Mr Right. It is a natural thing to internalise these emotions and start blaming the reflection in the mirror but I find these negative stereotypes are forced into our minds and those of our black men to believe black women are five of the following.
2. Gold diggers
3. Baby Mothers
4. Nappy headed
Single – it is a notorious fact “black girls can’t get a man” so they say. Why?
Because black women have too much attitude! But don’t be ashamed of that ladies, we as women demand order and respect because we run the household. We bare the children and ensure we keep ourselves groomed (hair and nails on fleek)
Despite that don’t push your man away with an attitude that forgets as a black woman you have a role to look after our men and protect our children making a man feel like a man will have any man falling at your feet.
Gold Digger – The term gold digger is a funny term as to me it can be seen as either positive or negative. On the positive it shows someone working hard thriving to show others the fruits of their labour yet on the negative it has been hyped to illustrate a black woman who only wants a man because of what he can buy her.
Now here is where it has been twisted in media to make the black woman look crazy, if a white man plans to pursue a white lady he would be expected to take her out, purchase dinner and drinks and possibly expensive gifts for anniversaries, birthdays.
Yet a black woman is a gold digger just for mentioning those things. It makes black women feel invaluable and that is not cool. Is the black womans time not worth enough to be bought? Is she not worth wining and dining being shown she is special. It is almost disrespectful that a black woman is seen as penniless can’t afford a meal. The black woman has worked the hardest to bring herself up from the struggle looking after the home, the children and still working a nightshift yet the black woman is poor?
Black men need to get out there and support their black sisters there isn’t know gold digging about it. Black women are worth gold.
3. Baby Mama – How do you as a black woman view marriage? Because if married is not something you aspire to be to the father of your children consider yourself a baby mama. Just the term alone takes away the ownership of the male and female relationship and literally just makes you responsible for his baby. It’s not good enough and you deserve better have a man claim you officially (wedding) in front of his friends and family then be his baby mother because if he messes up his not just breaking your heart but the hearts of those that came and watched the union.
4. Nappy headed – the first question I would ask my black sisters is how confident are you at doing your hair? Being confident at doing your hair means that you can take complete ownership of how you look to the world. Weaves, wigs and extensions are tools to enhance the styling ability of a black woman but as a black woman you should still be able to manipulate your natural hair to show off your natural beauty. It is important because as a black woman you need to show your black man that you are confident with what god gave you so if that’s a nappy head so be it. You don’t get laughed at for your hair texture just the inability to control it. My advice is to take back control and show your black man you are happy and confident with everything about yourselves.
5. Tooo Fat – Naturally women are built with more fat than men which means wider waists, bigger butts and enlarged bus sons. Now before I go in and say the media want us to be skinny bla bla bla. I would firstly admit black people as a whole eat far to much salt, sugar, oil, fat, which does mean we tend to carry extra junk in our trunks but still is there anything wrong with it nope not really. We need clothes too but as there are not any models on tv, magazines that represent women with curves black women tend to feel ashamed. It then leads to a fear of being naked not taking off your clothes infront of your partner. Not wanting him to see you naked. These are common insecurities amongst black women but ladies it doesn’t matter your man will find you alot more sexier than you find yourself just trust in him and if his someone you plan to be with for a long time, just build yourself up slowly, start with small pieces and take it from there.